The Meaning of Life For Dummies

1) Searching for the meaning of life is like trying to lick your elbow. You can't. The more you do, the more frustrated you get. Since life has no determined meaning, any meaning will do. Just create one, be happy and stop reading psychology magazines.

2) You don't get happy by realizing one big dream. You get happy by realizing many small-step realities. Only after that you will be able to call all that "a big dream". If you want dreams, keep sleeping.

3) Don't underestimate the role of feelings in your choices. Most will tell you life is made for sharks and that you should become colder to make it. Ok, sharks have two penises (i think i heard it somewhere), but this is the only good thing in being a shark. Overall, growing colder will also undermine your chances of success. Even Bill Gates is married.

4) You will never have the big idea. You are going to have a good idea and it's going to become big just as an avalanche takes up snow on it's way down. Just remember that dogs won't come searching for you if something goes wrong.

5) Before you give up any of the wonderful things life gives you for some religion, think twice. Any commandment that goes against the will for life is a rule of death, and thus should be rejected. I don't question that eternal beatitude could be fine. I would only like to see a brochure first.

6) Try to give up some part of yourself. I don't mean a kidney, I'm referring to your ego. Being able to say "i'm sorry", "i was wrong" and really mean it can make a big difference in the way you know yourself. Maybe you got it wrong and not the whole world out there. If you don't recognize it in time, well, that's how you end up in a bunker in Berlin.

7) Don't care too much about the judgement of other people. It can help you, but it shouldn't drive you. You should be able to tell how good your stuff is, and be your first judge. Ok, maybe this doesn't apply to Paris Hilton.

8) Whenever you feel something "relative" is sucking your energies out, go to point 1. There is no meaning, so there can't be any serious worry. Go for a walk, do something meaningless. Remember that giving a meaning depends on you. Then go call the police.

9) Try to know the world. Try to know what other people think, how they feel, how things work out of your backyard. Even if you can't travel, try to know the globe. Still, don't forget your backyard. People expect you to have one.

10) Tell things how they are. Don't try to be nice at any cost. Being nice it's the first cause of misunderstanding in the world. If everybody was smiling, we would be having a smiling war in months. When you need to stop smiling, stop. Expecially if you didnt brush your teeth.